Juno e il minotauro?

Juno si chiama così perchè suo padre adora la mitologia greca e decide di chiamare sua figlia Giunone, come la dea moglie di Zeus. Dopo avre sentito questa spiegazione sul nome della protagonista, non ho potuto fare a meno di pensare a “Il mio grosso grasso matrimonio greco”. Il padre della sposa (greco e fiero delle sue origini) dice al futuro genero (americano al 100%), che si cimenta in un errato augurio pasquale in lingua greca, “Quando i miei antenati parlavano di filosofia, i tuoi si dondolavano ancora sugli alberi”. Il tutto ovviamente in greco in modo che il povero sventurato non possa capire e continui a credere che in fondo il futuro suocero si era limitato a fargli i complimenti per la pronuncia-come gli ha fatto credere la futura sposa-. Juno cerca di impiccarsi con una caramella lunga 2 metri color rosso, beve 2 litri di succo d’arancia da una tanica – un contenitore simile l’ho visto per l’acqua distillata per il ferro da stiro- e per tutto il film si aggira con un bicchiere di plastica che contiene una bevanda color puffo. Giunone, assieme agli altri dei, accettava sacrifici umani per placare la sua ira, era gelosa di Zeus e si nutriva di ambrosia. C’è scritto da qualche parte di che colore è l’ambrosia? Secondo me era blu…

“If I was a flower growing wild and free
All I’d want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I was a tree growing tall and greeen
All I’d want is you to shade me and be my leaves
If I was a flower growing wild and free
All I’d want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I was a tree growing tall and greeen
All I’d want is you to shade me and be my leaves

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were a river in the mountains tall,
The rumble of your water would be my call.
If you were the winter, I know I’d be the snow
Just as long as you were with me, let the cold winds blow
All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were a wink, I’d be a nod
If you were a seed, well I’d be a pod.
If you were the floor, I’d wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I’d be a hug

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.
If you were the wood, I’d be the fire.
If you were the love, I’d be the desire.
If you were a castle, I’d be your moat,
And if you were an ocean, I’d learn to float.

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.”

(All I Want Is You written by Barry Louis Polisar)